How to survive London Fashion Week — if you’re not invited

london fashion week

You might be wondering, why do you need a survival guide for London Fashion Week Men’s if you’re not invited? Simply because it’s that time of the year when the streets get just a bit more crowded, there’s just a bit more traffic and those of us who just want to go on with our regular lives get just a bit more annoyed.

Even the T-shirt printers in London feel the heat!

ALSO – as ashamed I am to admit it – whenever fashion week comes around, I become just a tad more bitter because I’m reminded that I’m not part of that ‘in’ crowd.

Do you remember why in Sleeping Beauty Maleficent decided to curse Aurora? Because she didn’t get invited to the party. That’s why. Sure, ruining a baby’s life for something her parents did is a tad disproportionate – but it illustrates my point. Exclusion hurts.

 

maleficent gif - london fashion week men's

 

If you are among the select few who actually get to attend fashion week, then please don’t bother yourself with my words; just go ahead and watch Alexa Chung’s video.

For the rest of us, carb-eating mortals who don’t get to sit in the front row of BAND OF OUTSIDERS, here’s a bit of a different guide.

 

mean girls gif - london fashion week men's

 

Look at the glass half-full

Be positive, realise that it’s not actually a week but just four days. The shows start on Friday 9 and last until Monday 12. By Tuesday you’ll be back on your commute as if nothing ever happened.

Accept your emotions

Are you annoyed? Bothered? Jealous? Disgusted? Wished you were there? These are all petty normal emotions to have when a huge event you don’t get to be a part of takes over your city.

Just accept it sucks. Accepting negative emotions makes it easier to overcome them. The trick here is not to dwell on them — at least that’s what my therapist says.

Vent about it

Talk it out. Gather your fashion-week hating friends and tear it apart. Even if deep down you’d do anything to sit in the front row of Topman’s show, make fun of the ridiculous outfits, the stuck up journalists and the barely-breathing models.

Getting it off your chest will make you feel better; just don’t make a habit of it. Nobody likes to hang out Mr. or Ms. complain box. Don’t remember Harriet who wouldn’t shut up about her awful roommates? Exactly!

Avoid Twitter

Nothing can burst a bubble of isolation quite like an ill-timed tweet. If you want to avoid what’s going out there then the first thing you need to do is shun social media and Twitter in particular.

If you happen to follow several people who are attending or covering Fashion Week, unfollow them and create a separate list for these accounts. In case you didn’t know, on Twitter you don’t need to follow an account in order to add them to a list. This way they won’t appear on your feed, but you will still have easy access to the accounts once fashion week is over.

Try to stay home

Unless Anna Wintour comes knocking on your door (in that case, where do you live? and can I come visit?) then there are small chances you’ll have to deal with fashion week if you stay at home. Order a pizza and check out what’s good on Netflix or invest time on your hobbies and that novel you’ve been meaning to finish.

If you absolutely must go out, then avoid areas near where the shows are happening. These tend to get a bit crowded with press and onlookers alike. Here’s the full list of this season’s shows and venues.

Act cool about it

This is an industry that feeds on insecurity and a sense of exclusivity. If the ones who are ‘left out’ don’t mind then there’s no reason for the ones who are ‘in’ to feel superior because there’s nothing special about being ‘in’ anyway.

Hold your very own fashion week

Play the Fashion Week playlist on full blast, put on your best outfits and host your very own fashion week party at home. The world is your runway. WERK!

If you can’t beat them, join them!

Check out the list of events, some of them are open to the public. Also, Brewer Street becomes a show in itself during fashion week. Drop by to see the eccentric outfits and over-the-top attitudes.

Accept it and move on

It is what it is. Fashion week is cool, but in the age of fast-fashion and next-day delivery juggernauts, many are questioning its relevance. Maybe at the end of the day, all that it’s left are blisters, pouty mouths and little hours of sleep.

Think about how you can change your situation

If you’ve tried all of the above suggestions and you’re still upset, try to figure out if there’s a way you can attend the next one. I know it’s very exclusive, but sometimes we can surprise ourselves by what we can achieve when we pull a couple of strings and go through our contacts.

For example, I had no idea bloggers can apply for an accreditation. I’ll for sure try for the next one.

Happy Fashion Week!

 

the devil wears prada gif - london fashion week men's

 

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